Wednesday, December 26, 2007

26dec2007 CCC.

had CCC gathering today.
its post-christmas, belated-dec-babies-bdae celebration and jodi farewell celebration. haha.

had a great time at ichiban.
these guys nv fail to create laughter.





we made a scrap book for jodi. the 1st letter of each photo spells her name =)
cheers to CCC friendship!


goin off to taiwan in a few hours' time.
there's something that i wished for to happen.
630am.
haha.
silly.
but it'll really make me happie.
too bad i guess. not gonna happen.

thanks qx for asking.
feels good talking!
you're seriously my twin.



llwei~

Tuesday, December 25, 2007


went to serangoon 727durian shop to get durian crepes and durian puffs.
YUM YUM.

the food pinchers!
what a spread...

christmas2007/wilson bdae/ 7。

23dec2007



starhubber christmas 2007.
we're growing! so many people turned up!!
new, old.





24dec2007

wilson 21st bdae.






------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


在除夕夜的夜晚,
今天的月亮好圆,好亮。
黑暗的夜空,在月亮的衬托下,好迷人。
月亮好似有股光环围绕着。
有天使吗?

手机陆陆续续的震动着。
是圣诞节的祝福。
可怎么我,似乎感觉不到这节日的喜悦。



不喜欢没有回应的简讯。
简讯,是一个没有生命的科技工具
喜怒哀乐,没有层次, 没有真实感,没有可信度。

你是真的开心吗?
你是真的兴奋吗?
你是真心在关心我吗?
或只是在客套的寒暄。

没有回应的简讯,
让等待更加难受。

为你找各种理由,
可都敌不过,不被重视的事实。


那,就不要有第一个简讯呀。
这是口是心非。



7 天的期限,很快就要开始了。
7 天
7 天
7 天



有期望,但没胆量。
我想你也一样。
就等7天吧,
朋友。




llwei~

Sunday, December 23, 2007

23dec2007 城堡 与 木屋

我不可以习惯,和你的交谈。

我不可以习惯,要看到你的痕迹才能入睡。

我不可以习惯,和你分享我生活中一分一秒的细节。


看不到,会想。

等不到,会盼。

心中有股奇妙的兴奋和喜悦。


猜测,思考,判断

答案因该是零吧。


好可笑。

也不知道自己,在生谁的气;在懊恼什么 。

是不懂,还是不想懂。

好多事,不在我的掌控中。

告诉自己,尽力了,就不足以为惜。


请不要让我习惯。

因为后果是难以自拔的执著。

没有答案的等待,是种折腾,也让人有一次又一次的失望。



静下心来。

就这样吧。

你在你的城堡。

我在我的小木屋。


我必须承认,

童话世界的美丽传奇,不属于我。



就这样吧。

给自己7天的时间。




llwei~

Saturday, December 22, 2007

fear.

all of us have some fear within us.

the fear varies in forms and magnitude.

you have a choice.

to fight or to hide.


no doubt,

its scary because it cripple many.

cripple our courage, cripple our confidence, cripple our mind.

determination and courage is what it takes.

lost. uncertain. conscious.

like a giant hovering over us;

threatening. overwhelming. engulfing.


we stay hidden behind the fortress we'd built.

we miss the beautiful greenery.


it takes u a minute to decide.

it takes u a hundred million thousand more to fight.

its a smile of triumph at the end of the day

or a cowardice grin.

there's no time for regrets.

but many do.


i wanna make sure i don't.




llwei~

Thursday, December 20, 2007

20dec2007 a-z






i wanna bake.
this this this and this.
but i'm stranded at home.
nobody to drive me to supermart to buy ingredients.
i'm too lazy to take the bus.

a casual friend, it says.
who?
lasting, it says.
who?
change, it says.
WHO?


some dumbo.
argh.



A for Argh.
B for Bleah.
so many Cs
yet so many Ds.
so Exasperating.
ruin my Fs.
G for Goon.
H for Hur Hur.
Interesting, Jokes, Killing me.
L for Lame. S for Shit.
Meaning. None. O for oooOOOoooo
Patience. Quiet. Respond.
Time. You. VVe.
X.Why.Z.


drift.dream.dumbo
away.ask.argh.


wat can i say.
think las.




llwei~

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

19122007 white christmas.

从小,我就不喜欢等。

不知道结果的等。

不可以掌控的等。

可能不如你所意的等。

开始觉得,我会失望而归。

i yearn for a white christmas...

a christmas with warmth by the fireplace and lotsa santa love.

the warmth i can get from a Addidas jacket.

HAHA.


---------------------------------------------

some photos...
post ernnie bdae 17122007


post granny bdae @ The Soup Restaurant.
they have very good chicken!

my granny. she's so cute and cooperative with the cameraman.(tts me)


the different combi- the prettys, the handsomes, the old and the gonna-b-married. HA.


the cousins!


my family..still lacking 2...miss them!




llwei~

Saturday, December 15, 2007

15122007

我有个秘密。

但,是个不能说的秘密。

哈哈哈哈。


刚才在广播听到了这段话:
“一对情人分手后,就不该有恨。因为,人都有过错。不管是谁先对不起谁,过去了,恨只会让自己更沉迷。
有恨,就只代表,你还在乎。”

听着,思考着。
说的对。也许,是时候看开一点了。
不然,会不会是不成熟而幼稚的做法?

这或许是个提醒。
要我认真地对待我的生活。




沉默不语,我猜不透。
静静思索,我理不清。
好似宇宙般,难以摸索。
可能满载而归,可能守株待兔。

等吧
等咯
等咯

哈哈



llwei~

Friday, December 14, 2007

14dec2007 好朋友。

最美丽的爱情,

是
不离不弃的爱情,

是
敢于放手,真心祝福的爱情,

是
默默守候,无怨无悔,的爱情。


知道了,料到了,可是心还是 噼啪 噼啪 的跳得好快好快。
荧幕上的字,一一的在我脑袋挂了号。
慢慢的沉淀。

我 ok 呀。
朋友的关心,谢了。

献上我最真诚的祝福。

放下了,就该往前看,往前走。

不能以为, 只能已经。



人只有幸福,笑容才会真真正正的灿烂。


昨天,一个朋友变成了一个知己。
心窗的那扇门,让多一人闯入,只因为想让美丽的感情有个完美的句号。
即使只是十多分钟的交谈,但却是满满的关心,和疼爱。
这也是一种幸福!=)

没有伤感,没有后悔。
只有快乐。
谢谢你!
你要快乐哦!




llwei~

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

11Dec07 twinkle twinkle little stars

i look up.

count.
one. two. three. four

they shine. they twinkle. they sparkle.

in the dark monotonous sky,

they're the reason for u to crave for night time.


they stay shining by ur side.
moving with u, no matter how fast u are.

they stay bright,
just as if reminding you that, no matter how dark and gloomy ur day is, there will be a bright side...all is not lost.

they seat themselves so comfortably in the darkness,
bring calmness, yet with a tinge of happiness amidst the silence and stillness .


sometimes i love the night; it gives you the time to urself and for urself.
sometimes i dont; for it makes you feel how alone you are.

i know how silly it is to keep getting all emo.
the practical me asks 'whats the point.'
the sentimental me claims that 'its a girl thing.'

its useless to think about things that you have no control over.
its useless to get yourself depressed over things that had happened.
its useless to belittle urself.

i know these. but i just need to rant.
so no worries everyone!


twinkle twinkle little stars.
how i wonder what you are.
up above the world so high
like a diamond in the sky.

When the blazing sun is gone,
When he nothing shines upon,
Then you show your little light,
Twinkle, twinkle, all the night.

Then the traveler in the dark,
Thanks you for your tiny spark,
He could not see which way to go,
If you did not twinkle so.

In the dark blue sky you keep,
And often through my curtains peep,
For you never shut your eye,
Till the sun is in the sky.

As your bright and tiny spark,
Lights the traveller in the dark,
Though I know not what you are,
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.


little did i know that,
a nursery rhyme can brings such comfort at a age of twenty.


llwei~

Saturday, December 8, 2007

i suck

i suck.
i suck.
i suck.


haha. dont u agree.

stop day dreaming. get to work.

there's no why.
there's no maybe.
there's no if.


every action that we take, results in the steering of a certain situation to a certain conclusion.
every action is irreversible.
looking back, how many of us actually have the courage to reflect on and apologize for our mistakes.
道歉有用吗?又或许,你只可以硬着头皮,继续的错下去。
我想,我们就是这样。互相坚持着自己的原则,信念。。。为了保护自己,不得不。
现在想起来,醒悟了。
原来我是那么的自私。
想
想
想。
但又无可奈何。

尽管,最近 ‘想’ 是一个会让我沮丧和带来坏心情的一项‘活动’, 我还是不禁想 ‘想’, 想说。。。

我想, 让人们遗憾,后悔,束手无策 的原因,因该就是因为,
there's no undo function in our life.

thats right.
每一个抉择,拼凑起来,就得到一个结局。



llwei~

Friday, December 7, 2007

07122007

dunnoe what i want.

meet the old.
i wanna care just like before.
but gaze cant hold for long.
** looks away.

heard of the old.
a sense of envy. how fast.
wonder if i was in any position to feel what i had felt in the first place.
perhaps i was the hinderance. not ***.

look at the new.
counting.
how true? i cant be sure.

i cant feel **** words.

i cant commit. i hate the obligation. there isnt any.

quiet.different.

nice. full of virtues. but i'm a realist...
age.
prospect.
chemistry.
communication.

words of advice. dilute my thoughts.
rich. poor. who.
appreciated. wanted. deserted.
hoping. waiting. disappointment.
happy. intriguing. pressuring.
when. where. what. how.


i try to live everyday happily.
i smile.
but i think too.
cant find answers for myself. so i choose the easier route of escaping.

i have excuses. hmmm...no, they're valid reasons.

Huh. i dun get it.



llwei

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

05122007

4 subject:

tired.

expectations
disappoinment.
why cry.
listen.
move.
time.

now.
disappointed.
shelter.
stupid.
suffer.
time.

sometimes i wonder why. and i find no reason. i find no answers.
both life and human minds are complicated and hard to comprehend.
there are many things not within my control.
i can only lament;
i can only regret;
i can only feel and bear the pain.
in silence.

still, i smile.

i hope u smile too.
be happie.
be happie.
be happie.
when i said it 3 times, i meant it seriously.

can u hear me?
heavy and falling.


llwei~

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

04dec2007 no more

my connection is down down down again...

so i read. work. sleep.

no more MSN. bleah.


llwei~

Saturday, December 1, 2007

01dec2007 tears for you.

i teared.
for someone i do not know.

reading, i felt like i've actually know you.
your smile was just as vibrant as your personality.
thats the reason for the pain of many
for the heartache they felt.

i felt a sense of breathlessness.
i dont know why i held my breathe while reading; listening to the songs played in remembrance of you.

for the past few days, i've frens who mentioned to me that one of the five was their fren.

yesterday, i read an article in the newspaper written in memorance of jeremy.
she was someone who never met him but heard so many stories of him before.
for her, it was regrets.
regrets of letting fate ran past her so easily.
regrets of not making an effort to know this wonderful son and fren.
regrets of not being abe to have the chance to do anything again.



i thought hard.
i felt hard.
i've alwasy thought that life was vulnerable.
i know it, but when actually faced with it, how many of us can actually face it brave and standing tall?

it is not shame to let your tear flow. for it is these of which will make u stronger.
the acceptance of reality is the first step to moving on.
the courage to reminsce is the vow to keep him in your memory for ever and ever.


many says that angels took them away.
do angels exist? does heaven exist?
where does people go after they die?
heaven sounds like a good place, but is that the imaginery, a place of solace that people thought up of to make themselves feel better?
are people chosen to die? how are they chosen then? are bad people chosen or are the good ones chosen? how far is heaven from us?

how will i die? when will angels come and take me away?
how will my family deal with it?
maybe they had tried taking me away before, its my parents' love that made them let me stay.

i do not like the topic of death.
cos it makes me so childish and unrealistic.
i know its not possible to have everyone with me for ever and ever.
i know i'll have to face it eventually.
i'm an escapist.

i hope that they are indeed taken away by angels.
not just them, but everyone who dies.
like lala's granny.
somehow, i still remember her in the coffin. she looked beautiful and peaceful.
where is she going? i hope to see her again...


i teared again.
when i read through what i wrote. somehow, i like to read through my own post for everyword i wrote, it makes me feel.

emotions are so hard to comprehend.
even when its mine.

life is so complicated.
even when its mine.

i want to treasure.
tightly.
with all my love.
all before its too late.


lots of lurve
llwei~